My Randy Johnson is far too big. Its' extreme gurth and veiny texture have sent many a woman running away in tears. I've even sent a few woman to the hospital. All my friends have stopped talking to my because of penis envy. I can't hold a job because it always falls out of the bottom of my pant leg. What should I do about my massive Sandy Koufax.

Note: I call my penis by the name of famous MLB pitchers.